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It's amazing the way gratitude and loving one's life vanish when a cold arrives on the scene. I've been fighting it off for over a week, I thought successfully, but it appears that I'm succumbing after all dagnabbit. Well it won't be bad and it won't last. So there.
Today's horoscope says to let someone know how I feel before it's too late, because I've been sending mixed messages and the other person doesn't know how important they really are. Huh. I can't really imagine that... and if I could imagine it, I have no idea who it would be that I've been confusing so. So much for today's horoscope! I think I'll take the opportunity to learn how to read tea leaves instead.
I sent out feelers for a super bowl party. Everybody knows I don't care for football and don't have a television, but for some odd reason this year I want to watch. Maybe because of the miracle that makes the Cardinals one of the teams. Maybe because I'm finally over having football rammed down my throat in stereo all those years ago. Whatever the reason, I'd like to watch this year, surely there is a party I can crash.
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Friday, January 30, 2009
I think I must have forgotten what it feels like to be alive. There's nothing like a blood sucking soul destroying job for killing any inkling of joy, gratitude, freedom... So when it returns it's like a miracle. Nowadays I wake up grateful and looking forward to my day. There are moments when I actually love my life. Good grief, I had lost my belief that it was even possible to love my life!
We have recorded our second CD, Healing Rain. I'm not sure how I feel about this one, but I know that I cried after recording it, so I'm pretty sure the script works. :) As if it wasn't enough to cry after recording, I cried again when we played it through to get the voice/music balance worked out. Good thing Randall knows how to be kindly entertained by a sniffling girl. We also learned with this session that we need to start every session with some sort of invocation or Randall's computer will crash repeatedly and none of his files will appear on the file list. As soon as we asked for assistance everything was fine for the duration, thank you Azrael. I think we're on to something.
But enough about the second CD, what is important to note is that we are finally starting to earn money on the first CD! Back in November, someone listened to one track on Napster, and as a result, in January we have $0.011 in the bank! Yes you read that right! $0.011
If the road to riches is paved with pennies, we are definitely on that road! :-D
My house has suddenly become much more organized and orderly, and any day now I'll have to start pursuing methods of garnering actual income. I know that clients are coming any day now!
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We have recorded our second CD, Healing Rain. I'm not sure how I feel about this one, but I know that I cried after recording it, so I'm pretty sure the script works. :) As if it wasn't enough to cry after recording, I cried again when we played it through to get the voice/music balance worked out. Good thing Randall knows how to be kindly entertained by a sniffling girl. We also learned with this session that we need to start every session with some sort of invocation or Randall's computer will crash repeatedly and none of his files will appear on the file list. As soon as we asked for assistance everything was fine for the duration, thank you Azrael. I think we're on to something.
But enough about the second CD, what is important to note is that we are finally starting to earn money on the first CD! Back in November, someone listened to one track on Napster, and as a result, in January we have $0.011 in the bank! Yes you read that right! $0.011
If the road to riches is paved with pennies, we are definitely on that road! :-D
My house has suddenly become much more organized and orderly, and any day now I'll have to start pursuing methods of garnering actual income. I know that clients are coming any day now!
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Saturday, January 24, 2009
At last I have more things to say than I have time and space to type them. I'm always surprised by the length of my entries - it's the short version! It is! I swear!
I am excited to have a recording session scheduled for tomorrow. We've been trying for three months to put the second album together and it's thrilling to finally be there. Not that we've sold any copies of the first one yet, but that's a minor detail. We have a body of work that is waiting for us to present it, we can see it stretching out in front of us, and we know that it is ours. We should get on with it already. Poor Randall, I am always so impatient. He's not exactly what I would call a saint, but he is tolerant of me.
I am also excited to have a past life regression session scheduled for tomorrow. I learned some things with my surprise past life and I think it's time to address something else in the same way. One of my friends told me that in his experience there are physical symptoms that occur before a past life spontaneously surfaces. I had physical symptoms for a week before my surprise experience - I couldn't wake up, I was freezing, I had morning sickness. Morning sickness. There was no way, it was so confusing. But in retrospect it does seem reasonable that the recall of being poisoned and buried alive while in the first trimester of a pregnancy in another lifetime would lead to queasiness, sleepiness, and coldness in this lifetime.
So lately one of my eyes has been bothering me. Not just the eye, though, that whole side of my face, on down into my neck, shoulder, and upper arm. I keep having an image of something that seems extremely violent and that is probably related. Not that I want to visit another nasty rotten experience... but I would like to have my eye back.
I think the way it all works is amazing, simply amazing. The ability to heal is such a blessing, even when the process sucks. My agreement with God has always been that I will do whatever it takes to heal, and yet I was skeptical, I didn't believe, I sat on the fence... and now I am led to share Truth as I know it. My past life regression book will be a great book, it really will.
I bet this post is long already, and I'm not really finished....
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I am excited to have a recording session scheduled for tomorrow. We've been trying for three months to put the second album together and it's thrilling to finally be there. Not that we've sold any copies of the first one yet, but that's a minor detail. We have a body of work that is waiting for us to present it, we can see it stretching out in front of us, and we know that it is ours. We should get on with it already. Poor Randall, I am always so impatient. He's not exactly what I would call a saint, but he is tolerant of me.
I am also excited to have a past life regression session scheduled for tomorrow. I learned some things with my surprise past life and I think it's time to address something else in the same way. One of my friends told me that in his experience there are physical symptoms that occur before a past life spontaneously surfaces. I had physical symptoms for a week before my surprise experience - I couldn't wake up, I was freezing, I had morning sickness. Morning sickness. There was no way, it was so confusing. But in retrospect it does seem reasonable that the recall of being poisoned and buried alive while in the first trimester of a pregnancy in another lifetime would lead to queasiness, sleepiness, and coldness in this lifetime.
So lately one of my eyes has been bothering me. Not just the eye, though, that whole side of my face, on down into my neck, shoulder, and upper arm. I keep having an image of something that seems extremely violent and that is probably related. Not that I want to visit another nasty rotten experience... but I would like to have my eye back.
I think the way it all works is amazing, simply amazing. The ability to heal is such a blessing, even when the process sucks. My agreement with God has always been that I will do whatever it takes to heal, and yet I was skeptical, I didn't believe, I sat on the fence... and now I am led to share Truth as I know it. My past life regression book will be a great book, it really will.
I bet this post is long already, and I'm not really finished....
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Thursday, January 22, 2009
I have been feeling tremendously guilty for not posting to my blog - after all, what's the use of a blog that nobody posts to? So I'm glad to finally be sitting here typing, even if what I have to say is a list of excuses and justifications. :-)
The first thing that happened was that I facilitated a past life regression for a friend. I've been pretty much on the fence about past lives, but have never doubted past life regression as a valid and useful therapy tool. I therefore have not hesitated to facilitate them. However, this time when my friend reached resolution, I was affected.
Someone told me that it's probably an occupational hazard. Maybe so, but it certainly wasn't one I had anticipated. I was forced to spend some time working through my part of the past life I'd shared with my friend, which was no small effort. Fortunately help was available. In the process I found the tools I needed to effect healing on the cellular level and seem to be mostly done healing a sleep disorder.
None of that is exactly what I would call a picnic. Totally worth it, and I am extremely grateful to be able to address things in such a way. But still not a picnic. Healing is like that, I find - it's great to be healed, but doing the healing often sucks.
Next I went to Albuquerque for a while to help out while my mother was on a vacation. It was great to spend that time, I love that I can pick up and do that. As a family we're not used to me being available, but it sure is great that I am. I watched old movies with my grandfather. Let me tell you, that's the way to do it - every thing you wonder about while watching is something you can find out on the spot.
During the drive home yesterday I saw something in the sky and felt that God was looking down at me. At that moment I knew, all through me knew, that it's time. The old is done, the new begins, it is time. I asked for help with the parts that are still a struggle for me - I wondered if there is ever enough faith, and was informed that I have always had exactly the right amount. Hadn't thought of it that way, but I suppose it's true. After all - here I am.
As I was dragging suitcases from the car to the back door, a voice said to me, "you have the most beautiful aura I have ever seen". um... I said really? He said yes. I thanked him. He said that it almost looked pure, but that couldn't be right, because I looked too old for that to be true. I said, quite dryly, that I've done a substantial amount of work. He said yes, he guessed I must have.
Curiosity got the better of me and I asked him what it looked like. He said that the colors were shifting such that he couldn't really tell me what they were, but that all of it was clear and bright and full. I said that was nice to know. He said that he couldn't even detect scars and wondered how that could be. I told him that there is a way to cleanse even the scars, and that he must be catching me in an extra good moment, because I still have some things I'm working on and have not yet attained perfection.
Then he said, "God told me that I would know you by your purity. I wasn't sure, but here you are and now I understand." I said that really, we would need to meet - in person, in the physical world. I have a rule about that. He said he understood.
I thought it was a fun fantasy, and then I had a dream.
He was in the dream, of course. I know what he looks like, it was a very clear dream. We were doing something that had to do with boxes. Someone is packing or moving or something. He seemed very serious and I noticed that although I could see him clearly, I couldn't really see his energy. It had to be bright, though, we were not in a dark place.
It felt very much like meeting someone new for the first time, not like the times I've dreamt about someone new in this lifetime. This was a new person. I felt my usual hesitancy, caution. I thought that he was also being cautious and hesitant. In the dream I remembered my vision, and when I did, he commented about what God told him.
I woke up feeling just slightly freaked out. It's time, and he's almost here. Oh my goodness. I hope there's enough time for me to get the house clean!
.
The first thing that happened was that I facilitated a past life regression for a friend. I've been pretty much on the fence about past lives, but have never doubted past life regression as a valid and useful therapy tool. I therefore have not hesitated to facilitate them. However, this time when my friend reached resolution, I was affected.
Someone told me that it's probably an occupational hazard. Maybe so, but it certainly wasn't one I had anticipated. I was forced to spend some time working through my part of the past life I'd shared with my friend, which was no small effort. Fortunately help was available. In the process I found the tools I needed to effect healing on the cellular level and seem to be mostly done healing a sleep disorder.
None of that is exactly what I would call a picnic. Totally worth it, and I am extremely grateful to be able to address things in such a way. But still not a picnic. Healing is like that, I find - it's great to be healed, but doing the healing often sucks.
Next I went to Albuquerque for a while to help out while my mother was on a vacation. It was great to spend that time, I love that I can pick up and do that. As a family we're not used to me being available, but it sure is great that I am. I watched old movies with my grandfather. Let me tell you, that's the way to do it - every thing you wonder about while watching is something you can find out on the spot.
During the drive home yesterday I saw something in the sky and felt that God was looking down at me. At that moment I knew, all through me knew, that it's time. The old is done, the new begins, it is time. I asked for help with the parts that are still a struggle for me - I wondered if there is ever enough faith, and was informed that I have always had exactly the right amount. Hadn't thought of it that way, but I suppose it's true. After all - here I am.
As I was dragging suitcases from the car to the back door, a voice said to me, "you have the most beautiful aura I have ever seen". um... I said really? He said yes. I thanked him. He said that it almost looked pure, but that couldn't be right, because I looked too old for that to be true. I said, quite dryly, that I've done a substantial amount of work. He said yes, he guessed I must have.
Curiosity got the better of me and I asked him what it looked like. He said that the colors were shifting such that he couldn't really tell me what they were, but that all of it was clear and bright and full. I said that was nice to know. He said that he couldn't even detect scars and wondered how that could be. I told him that there is a way to cleanse even the scars, and that he must be catching me in an extra good moment, because I still have some things I'm working on and have not yet attained perfection.
Then he said, "God told me that I would know you by your purity. I wasn't sure, but here you are and now I understand." I said that really, we would need to meet - in person, in the physical world. I have a rule about that. He said he understood.
I thought it was a fun fantasy, and then I had a dream.
He was in the dream, of course. I know what he looks like, it was a very clear dream. We were doing something that had to do with boxes. Someone is packing or moving or something. He seemed very serious and I noticed that although I could see him clearly, I couldn't really see his energy. It had to be bright, though, we were not in a dark place.
It felt very much like meeting someone new for the first time, not like the times I've dreamt about someone new in this lifetime. This was a new person. I felt my usual hesitancy, caution. I thought that he was also being cautious and hesitant. In the dream I remembered my vision, and when I did, he commented about what God told him.
I woke up feeling just slightly freaked out. It's time, and he's almost here. Oh my goodness. I hope there's enough time for me to get the house clean!
.
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